I Keep Expecting
Posted: November 21, 2007 at 10:01 amI keep expecting to wake up at 4:30am to a silent house and have my water break. It doesn’t seem to be happening.
I know that this pregnancy is different, is unique. But when a contraction wakes me up, I always look at the clock and think, “Is it 4:30? Is this happening again?”And then I have a minor panic attack until a few minutes pass and I realize that, no, it’s not happening.
It’s kind of draining to relive moments of my pregnancy with the Munchkin every single night/morning at 4:30. I don’t think people should be forced to think much or feel more at that hour. And so, physically, I’m being beaten from the inside. And emotionally, I’m being slammed over and over. I shut my eyes. And I try to get to my happy place. But between the contractions and the memories… I’m usually up for another full hour. An hour of physical and emotional pain.
I keep expecting things to happen. And they don’t.
The Discussion
see what everyone is saying
Things WILL happen. I’m so sorry you’re struggling with memories of being pg with the Munchkin. I’m thinking of you almost hourly lately and checking for updates.
Come on already LittleBrother. Lets GO!
Luann’s last blog post..In a crabby state
hey, wow, for the first time in like forever your blog rendered properly for me under firefox.
hang in there!
((((((((((Jenna)))))))) you are in my prayers.
Tammy’s last blog post..When Pain Is What It Is
You are often in my good thoughts these days. I wish you a healthy and safe birth – sooner rather than later. Your love for the Munchkin always shines through so brightly – even though acknowledging it must sometimes make life harder. But, I know you must and marvel at your courage.