Revolutionary (or Evolutionary, even) Titleage
Posted: May 15, 2008 at 11:48 amI like magicpointeshoe. She’s smart. She’s recently been discussing terminology in adoption land regarding “birth parents.” She clarified a recent post just this morning and I have to quote this paragraph:
There is one more thought that I have on the topic. In one of my courses this semester on people with disabilities, I studied part of the history of terminology used on people with disabilities. Their history in reform of how they were being treated included changing the language used into people first terminology. Instead of giving a description of a person to be looked for as a “wheelchaired lady” it should be a lady using a wheelchair. That the disability isn’t what defines the person and therefore shouldn’t be used first to describe a person. I think that totally applies in the feelings of why the birth qualifier is starting to disappear a bit.
Wow. I’ve never been able to pinpoint why the “birth mother” title has bothered me. While I do typically refer to myself via the “first mother” term and feel a general sense of comfort with it, there have been times when it hasn’t felt just right as well. And that’s the nail on the head there.
Very interesting. Kudos for making me ponder, magicpointeshoe!
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We debate this at my house all the time. I use first mom and birth mom because I have a lack of a better term. If you come up with one – let me know! :) My son tends to talk about his first mom (see no better term) by first name because that is what he is most comfortable with. So, far he only understands that he grew in her belly, but not what that means to him long term. He is three, it will probably be several years before he truly knows what it means to him.
Mary’s last blog post..Funny Coincidences
It is nice getting my feet wet again writing about adoption.
magicpointeshoe’s last blog post..why the change is starting to happen in birthparent terminology
This is why, in real life/conversation, I refer to myself as a woman or mother who relinquished a child.
It might be longer but I find it most accurate.
Nicole’s last blog post..Jealous?
I found the same thing in my special education course this semester. You aren’t supposed to refer to a student as an autistic child but as a child with autism.