As part of a carnival with Grown in my Heart, I’m answering the non-question: What no one told me about adoption.
As I’m writing this on a visit, I can think of a million and one things. Basically, I wasn’t told anything about the realities of adoption. Nothing. Our agency did nothing to prepare us for the ins and outs of making an open adoption work. In fact, our agency did nothing to educate us as to what open adoption could or could not entail. They told us nothing. Absolutely nothing.
Who knew that I would one day be watching my daughter and her brother, alone in the house with them, while her mom and stepdad (as of yesterday) were out at their rehearsal evening dinner. I mean, who would have guessed that I’d be helping my daughter’s mom put her wedding favors together, almost five years after she helped me put my wedding favors together. These aren’t things you think of; there’s no way to plan for this kind of reality.
I could be jaded. Sometimes I am. But the fact is that, no, I wasn’t told anything. But we’ve made it work. We’ve made mistakes. I’ve had to eat humble pie and apologize on occasion. I’ll probably have to do so in the future.
All I know is this: no one told me it would be so hard. But no one told me it could be so wonderful. I live the reality of those two truths and I hope that by sharing those two truths, I will help others as they live their reality.
My name is Jenna. I blog here, 
