Today is my youngest son’s birthday. We were enjoying lunch together, talking about our plans for the rest of the day. (A few errands, picking up the newspaper to see his birthday announcement, supper, time with daddy at the fire department for cake and presents and so on.) Then we got to talking about birthdays and my older son was adding a lot to the conversation.
We discussed how they both grew in my belly and how I gave birth to them on their birthdays.
N: So, I grew in your belly. And so did P.
Me: Yes you did.
N: And so did Munchkin.
Me: Yes she did. So, Munchkin is your…
N: Sister.
P: SISTER! (He repeats everything his brother said which is why his vocabulary is insane.)
We talked a little bit more about brothers, sisters and so on. My older son did ask if JD, Munchkin’s brother via her adoptive parents, also grew in my belly. It was a logical question considering what we had been discussing. When I said no, his eyebrows furrowed a little bit. I explained that JD grew in D’s belly and he was still Munchkin’s brother but not his brother. He gave me his, “Oh, yes yes,” that he does when something is obvious though I know he’s a little bit confused on that particular connection.
Confusion is okay with me as long as we keep discussing these things.
On a different note, I wrapped the Munchkin’s birthday present and one of her Christmas presents and sent them off with a Zhu Zhu pet yesterday. The Zhu Zhu Pet is for D to give, not me but it felt really great to help out in that way! (Yes, the boys both have Zhu Zhu pets as well.) It also felt great to send the gifts out early. It’s very difficult to stay on task and organized during this time of year. I feel proud. I feel as if I’ve done right by her.
It’s silly. I know that our relationship is not contingent upon gifts or mailing things on time. But I’d never stand for giving the boys their presents late. Why should I do any less when it comes to her? Perhaps its been an emotional block in the past. I do find it difficult to go to a store and shop for her, especially when it comes to clothes. I don’t know. Just glad to have gotten it almost finished early this year. Excuse me while I pat myself on the back.
My name is Jenna. I blog here, 
I remember my kids first mom telling me about having the very same conversation with her (parented) son. After explaining to her son why his (placed) brother and sister’s older sister wasn’t also his sister, he very matter of factly stated ” Well I don’t care about all of that, if she’s THEIR sister then she is kind of MY sister too!” That was 6 years ago, and he now says that he “kind of, sort of” has a big sister too. All that matters to us is that we are a family – all of us.
And the Zhu Zhu pet – that deserves TWO pats on the back!
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