Comments on: A New Low for the Adoption Industry http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com/2010/07/28/a-new-low-for-the-adoption-industry/ Writing Our Ever-Evolving Story Sat, 19 May 2012 16:21:24 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.2 By: 7rin http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com/2010/07/28/a-new-low-for-the-adoption-industry/comment-page-1/#comment-7193 7rin Fri, 22 Jul 2011 02:31:31 +0000 http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com/?p=1144#comment-7193 As a adult who was adopted as a child I can’t help but feel a lot angry at your reply to this post. "<i>giving a child up for adoption is the most important, most incredible thing one can do as a parent</i>" Yes, because ABANDONING your child always but always screams I love you - not! The most important and most incredible thing one can do as a parent is to raise your own kid with love and care and attention. ABANDONING said child is the exact opposite of "most important" and "most incredible" thing that a parent can do. Perhaps also you should take a look at how much is spent on finding out how best to coerce women out of their kids (women 'cause dads never count, if you want to avoid dad issues, just move to Utah): The National Council for Adoption: Mothers, Money, Marketing, and Madness * Part 1 @ http://www.divinecaroline.com/22095/39669-national-council-adoption-mothers-money * Part 2 @ http://www.divinecaroline.com/22095/39676-national-council-adoption--mothers--money- It's entirely possible to help someone parent without snatching their child away from them: Each One Help One @ http://www.values.com/your-inspirational-stories/1306-EACH-ONE-HELP-ONE Abandoned to adoption at 7mths old. I didn't have a bad adoption - my afamily are the best I could ever have chosen... but if I'd been able to choose, I'd've chosen to be aborted instead. At least then the lifetime of agony would've been over in minutes/hours/days, instead of the decades that I've been suffering for now. Abandoned early 1973. Reunited late 2009. As a adult who was adopted as a child I can’t help but feel a lot angry at your reply to this post.

“giving a child up for adoption is the most important, most incredible thing one can do as a parent”

Yes, because ABANDONING your child always but always screams I love you – not!

The most important and most incredible thing one can do as a parent is to raise your own kid with love and care and attention. ABANDONING said child is the exact opposite of “most important” and “most incredible” thing that a parent can do.

Perhaps also you should take a look at how much is spent on finding out how best to coerce women out of their kids (women ’cause dads never count, if you want to avoid dad issues, just move to Utah):

The National Council for Adoption: Mothers, Money, Marketing, and Madness
* Part 1 @ http://www.divinecaroline.com/22095/39669-national-council-adoption-mothers-money
* Part 2 @ http://www.divinecaroline.com/22095/39676-national-council-adoption–mothers–money-

It’s entirely possible to help someone parent without snatching their child away from them: Each One Help One @ http://www.values.com/your-inspirational-stories/1306-EACH-ONE-HELP-ONE

Abandoned to adoption at 7mths old. I didn’t have a bad adoption – my afamily are the best I could ever have chosen… but if I’d been able to choose, I’d've chosen to be aborted instead. At least then the lifetime of agony would’ve been over in minutes/hours/days, instead of the decades that I’ve been suffering for now.

Abandoned early 1973. Reunited late 2009.

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]]> By: 7rin http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com/2010/07/28/a-new-low-for-the-adoption-industry/comment-page-1/#comment-7188 7rin Thu, 21 Jul 2011 17:08:55 +0000 http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com/?p=1144#comment-7188 Yahoo! Answers isn't the greatest of places, but it does get hit a lot by other sites dredging for content, thus have asked http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20110721100449AAwYhO3 :} Yahoo! Answers isn’t the greatest of places, but it does get hit a lot by other sites dredging for content, thus have asked http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20110721100449AAwYhO3

:}

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]]> By: Jenna http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com/2010/07/28/a-new-low-for-the-adoption-industry/comment-page-1/#comment-5402 Jenna Thu, 09 Sep 2010 21:54:05 +0000 http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com/?p=1144#comment-5402 As it is equally unfair to dismiss my experience because your adoption was great. As it is equally unfair to expect me to champion for the opposite of what I want -- blatant reform. You admit that you think rarely about my side of the triad, but I spend countless time championing for yours. Interesting, isn't it? Then again, I'm honest about who I am, but you're not. I don't normally take well to people parading as one thing but being another on my site. It's a red flag troll warning and I've had my fair share of trolls. If you're not a troll, please take this as a warning that using another name while using your real email address is a big warning that you have something to hide and are thus not to be trusted re: comments. In the future: be honest about who you are and don't start off a conversation by telling someone that they're doing it wrong. I have no patience for would-be trolls or people who think their reality is somehow better than my own. I don't treat others that way and I demand the same respect <em>in my own space</em>. As it is equally unfair to dismiss my experience because your adoption was great. As it is equally unfair to expect me to champion for the opposite of what I want — blatant reform. You admit that you think rarely about my side of the triad, but I spend countless time championing for yours. Interesting, isn’t it?

Then again, I’m honest about who I am, but you’re not.

I don’t normally take well to people parading as one thing but being another on my site. It’s a red flag troll warning and I’ve had my fair share of trolls. If you’re not a troll, please take this as a warning that using another name while using your real email address is a big warning that you have something to hide and are thus not to be trusted re: comments.

In the future: be honest about who you are and don’t start off a conversation by telling someone that they’re doing it wrong. I have no patience for would-be trolls or people who think their reality is somehow better than my own. I don’t treat others that way and I demand the same respect in my own space.

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]]> By: Regina http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com/2010/07/28/a-new-low-for-the-adoption-industry/comment-page-1/#comment-5401 Regina Thu, 09 Sep 2010 21:45:25 +0000 http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com/?p=1144#comment-5401 I didn't mean to offend you, I just wanted to share a different point of view. I saw a chance to be part of a discussion to which I am inextricably linked and passionate about. However, judging by the condescending tone of your reply, I can tell I did. I find your blog to be insightful and touching and through it have learned a lot about the part of the triad I don't usually think about. I also applaud the work being done by you and others like you to make this broken, isolating industry more humane. My adoption was "super great", but that doesn't mean I don't struggle with a lot of the same things that other adoptees do, the specifics of which I won't bore you. So to boil it down to "butterflies and rainbows" is unfair. I didn’t mean to offend you, I just wanted to share a different point of view. I saw a chance to be part of a discussion to which I am inextricably linked and passionate about. However, judging by the condescending tone of your reply, I can tell I did. I find your blog to be insightful and touching and through it have learned a lot about the part of the triad I don’t usually think about. I also applaud the work being done by you and others like you to make this broken, isolating industry more humane.

My adoption was “super great”, but that doesn’t mean I don’t struggle with a lot of the same things that other adoptees do, the specifics of which I won’t bore you. So to boil it down to “butterflies and rainbows” is unfair.

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]]> By: Jenna http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com/2010/07/28/a-new-low-for-the-adoption-industry/comment-page-1/#comment-5399 Jenna Thu, 09 Sep 2010 20:01:52 +0000 http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com/?p=1144#comment-5399 I'm super glad your adoption was super great. My story is one of lies, mistreatment and a total lack of consideration for anything ethical. The agency through which I placed was this particular agency and I will continue to out them in hopes that people considering using their services will think twice. As far as working with the industry, I have spoken at various conferences on the matter. I continue to help adoptees in their fight for their OBCs. I <em>do</em> the work. And I can still call a villain a villain when I see one. My story does not dismiss your story nor does your story make adoption full of butterflies and rainbows. There is room enough for both of us. I’m super glad your adoption was super great. My story is one of lies, mistreatment and a total lack of consideration for anything ethical. The agency through which I placed was this particular agency and I will continue to out them in hopes that people considering using their services will think twice.

As far as working with the industry, I have spoken at various conferences on the matter. I continue to help adoptees in their fight for their OBCs. I do the work. And I can still call a villain a villain when I see one.

My story does not dismiss your story nor does your story make adoption full of butterflies and rainbows. There is room enough for both of us.

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]]> By: Regina http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com/2010/07/28/a-new-low-for-the-adoption-industry/comment-page-1/#comment-5398 Regina Thu, 09 Sep 2010 19:24:59 +0000 http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com/?p=1144#comment-5398 As a child of adoption I can't help but feel a little injured by your post. I'm certain beyond any shadow of a doubt that being adopted (as a newborn) was the best thing that ever happened to me. I respect the difficult decision my bio-mom made and am forever grateful that she loved me enough to let me go. But I feel comforted by the closed adoption and have never had nor will never have (I'm 28 now) the desire to find her. Nor she me, I'm guessing. While I detest both "16 and Pregnant" and "Teen Mom" and this particular agencies involvement, I think your post is inflammatory and paints all adoption in a bad light. While I agree that reform in the Adoption industry is long overdue and the ethical missteps are egregious, I think people do need to understand that sometimes, in some situations, giving a child up for adoption is the most important, most incredible thing one can do as a parent. I also find a void in the debate where the voices of adopted children should be. Perhaps the best course of action is to work with the people of and affected by this industry to find the reform we so desperately need than vilifying it. As a child of adoption I can’t help but feel a little injured by your post. I’m certain beyond any shadow of a doubt that being adopted (as a newborn) was the best thing that ever happened to me. I respect the difficult decision my bio-mom made and am forever grateful that she loved me enough to let me go. But I feel comforted by the closed adoption and have never had nor will never have (I’m 28 now) the desire to find her. Nor she me, I’m guessing.
While I detest both “16 and Pregnant” and “Teen Mom” and this particular agencies involvement, I think your post is inflammatory and paints all adoption in a bad light. While I agree that reform in the Adoption industry is long overdue and the ethical missteps are egregious, I think people do need to understand that sometimes, in some situations, giving a child up for adoption is the most important, most incredible thing one can do as a parent. I also find a void in the debate where the voices of adopted children should be.
Perhaps the best course of action is to work with the people of and affected by this industry to find the reform we so desperately need than vilifying it.

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]]> By: Lavonne http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com/2010/07/28/a-new-low-for-the-adoption-industry/comment-page-1/#comment-5327 Lavonne Fri, 06 Aug 2010 05:01:56 +0000 http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com/?p=1144#comment-5327 oh boy. no words really. except to say that we did receive an information packet from said agency when we were doing our research. we took one look at the glossy package and DVD full of "rosy beautiful" adoption stories and promptly threw it in the garbage. oh boy. no words really. except to say that we did receive an information packet from said agency when we were doing our research. we took one look at the glossy package and DVD full of “rosy beautiful” adoption stories and promptly threw it in the garbage.

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]]> By: cindy http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com/2010/07/28/a-new-low-for-the-adoption-industry/comment-page-1/#comment-5317 cindy Sun, 01 Aug 2010 19:30:13 +0000 http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com/?p=1144#comment-5317 Of course this is like...I just can't believe that this is like...real..!! Funny thought though...the cartoon on that first snapshot ad...kinda looks like you...yeah...oh dear...lol...not really funny though... What is this world coming too. Of course this is like…I just can’t believe that this is like…real..!!

Funny thought though…the cartoon on that first snapshot ad…kinda looks like you…yeah…oh dear…lol…not really funny though…

What is this world coming too.

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]]> By: Ashleigh http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com/2010/07/28/a-new-low-for-the-adoption-industry/comment-page-1/#comment-5305 Ashleigh Fri, 30 Jul 2010 17:34:50 +0000 http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com/?p=1144#comment-5305 I never knew you used ANLC. I almost used them when I placed my son. I had all the papers filled out and everything ready to be mailed back, but something just didn't feel right. So I called them and told them I found a couple on my own, and promptly switched agencies. I am SO glad I did. This is just disgusting.... I feel for the girls who will end up getting used for this. I never knew you used ANLC. I almost used them when I placed my son. I had all the papers filled out and everything ready to be mailed back, but something just didn’t feel right. So I called them and told them I found a couple on my own, and promptly switched agencies. I am SO glad I did. This is just disgusting…. I feel for the girls who will end up getting used for this.

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]]> By: Brenda Romanchik http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com/2010/07/28/a-new-low-for-the-adoption-industry/comment-page-1/#comment-5304 Brenda Romanchik Fri, 30 Jul 2010 11:36:07 +0000 http://thechroniclesofmunchkinland.com/?p=1144#comment-5304 This is beyond vile. Thank you for all the work you do to get the word out. This is beyond vile. Thank you for all the work you do to get the word out.

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