Apr 162008
 

A weight lifted. Not all the way off of my shoulders exactly. I still feel overwhelmed and overtired and overstimulated and over… everything. But…

Have you ever just re-focused yourself? Reminded yourself about the ultimate goal instead of the immediate problem? I’ve been doing a lot of that over the past week or so. Not that I’ve had a lot of time to devote to myself and my healing. Motherhood, wifely-ness and writing have been demanding my focus as well. But I’ve found bits and pieces of time, just here and there, to take a look within myself. I’ve journaled on paper. I’ve thought out loud. I’ve taken walks. Granted, the walks were with the boys but one falls asleep and the other chats to himself the whole time so I can think about things but still say, “Yes, the car is red.”

I don’t feel great about everything that’s going on. I don’t know what the outcomes will be. I don’t even know what I should be doing really… except focusing on what is important. And that’s my daughter. I need to keep doing what I’m doing: writing my monthly letters, sending pictures of the boys (her brothers) and being as present as I can be. I made promises. I will keep them. And I will have faith that everything else will come together for good.

Easier said than done, I know. But tonight, my outlook is positive. I can’t guarantee that I will feel the same tomorrow. But tonight feels good in my soul.

 Posted by at 9:21 pm
Apr 052008
 

My best friend delivered a (what I have heard to be) BEAUTIFUL baby boy on Thursday evening. (The “heard to be” is assumed, of course, but my parents got to go to the hospital last night and hold the baby before me! Shucks!) I drove back to The Farm on Thursday morning, assuming that she had already delivered the baby since she was in labor at 9:30am on Wednesday morning. Wrong. Still in labor. I had to go back home without seeing the baby.

All day Thursday, I was awash with emotion. This is the best friend who was with me during Munchkin’s labor and delivery. She supported me without knowing what either of us were doing. She got up close and personal with things you don’t usually see on your best friend. She held me as I cried. She’s the one who took me out to dinner the night after I signed the TPR papers. She was there through it all even though I moved six days after birth. She continued to be there as I brought my first parented son into the world, hanging out in the labor room until it came time to push, understanding that I’d want that time with my Husband. (Truth be told, I missed her presence though the special moment with my Husband will always be treasured.) She couldn’t come to my youngest son’s birth because she was pregnant and working. But she was “there” with me.

Any time I thought about her laboring or giving birth on Thursday, tears would creep into my eyes. This woman will be the best mother ever. She already has shown that in so many ways in her life, through the way she has supported me, spoiled my children, suffered through a loss and cherished her pregnancy. I cannot begin to describe how outstandingly happy I am for her and how EXCITED I am to hold this new baby. Oh, and snap pictures because that’s what I do. It’s who I am.

It feels AWESOME to be this happy for someone when it comes to babies and my past adoption issues. It’s kind of freeing. I didn’t expect to feel anything other than elated for her as she’s just amazing but I worried I might feel something weird. And I don’t. And that’s good. Some healing has taken place even in the past few months. These are all good signs.

Now I need to run to the store before we get ready to drive back to The Farm today. My best friend and her silly Husband decided not to find out the gender of the baby until HE was born so now I am present-less! Have to go find something cute for the new addition!

 Posted by at 7:41 am